Point Counterpoint offers differing literary views on various topics.  This one discusses if the author’s photograph should be included on the back cover.  

Smile, Say Cheese

POINT

By S. L. Kotar

I don’t believe there is any counterpoint to this segment, so if none follows, that will be a pity but I’ll have had the final word on this regretful topic.

I say (type) regretful because it is a subject which should never have to be discussed by civilized people. I refer, of course, not to any political divide for which conversation is loud, angry and moot, but to the unnecessary, uncalled for and utterly spurious idea of posting the Author’s Photograph on the back cover of their books.

One flat statement covers it all: Writers are meant to be read, not seen. While I hesitate to offer a blanket statement that all authors look like trolls (a compliment, by the way), they hardly ever look… human. Which, by itself isn’t bad, but to the General Public at Large, it isn’t good. Men are often unshaven (don’t get me started); women wear enough make-up pose for ads of a different sort. Men pose with pipes; women with pets. Men stare off into the horizon as though they were contemplating the stars; women either appear like they’re sitting for their high school yearbook photo or lean forward with one arm extended as if they’re adding to their portfolio to be submitted to a Hollywood producer.

Don’t get me wrong. Some writers are actually passable, even attractive. I say to them, don’t waste your good looks by worming your way into my field. Try auditioning for the News at 6. Be a weather-forecaster; do a tire commercial – it worked for Stephen Colbert. Show up as a recurring character on an Original Amazon Series. Pretty people should do pretty things. Look for work where the sign says, “No Trolls Need Apply.” You’ll be better paid, believe me.

Author’s photographs are prejudicial. Once you see she/he, the Reader makes a snap decision about the book. Like “Columbo,” they’re only right about 65% of the time (I forget the actual quote), but that’s enough. If 65% of people don’t like your mug, you’re toast. And then, painfully, there are the “time passes” progression of photographs. If you’re fortunate enough to continue publishing (you notice I didn’t use the word “writing”), you will age. That means eventually your publisher will force you to have a new pix taken for the back cover.

Case in point: Dean Koontz. He writes science fiction. I started following him back in the Before Time when he was just coming into Fame and Fortune. In those days his back-cover photograph depicted a nice looking youngish man with a pleasant smile. (Fortunately, I tried to block it from my mind and read his books anyway.) A few times he posed with his Golden Retriever. That was touching but you had to wonder what ranking that placed his wife. Not good. Eventually, the dog died and he needed a new picture.

Unfortunately, the years had taken its toll on him. He was seriously receding, and with a noticeable Lack of Hair he didn’t look so youngish. And his pleasant smile looked just a tad more… successful. Much worse. I suppose this rather drastic alteration was brought to whoever designs back covers and the nearly bald snapshot with the rich man’s smile was replaced by a hairpiece and a folksy grin. If one was awkward, the other was embarrassing. It wasn’t Dean’s fault. The only really decent hairpiece I’ve ever seen was worn by Ray Milland and he readily admitted it and won an Academy Award. Well, there were a few others, but I still haven’t gotten over the discovery…

If my writing partner and I had affixed our photographs to the script we submitted to GUNSMOKE, we never would have sold it, as the story consultant thought we were two 45-year old men. That would have meant no name on the credits for us, no beau for Miss Kitty and no chance for a jealous Matt to play the White Knight at the end. (We killed off the erstwhile “lover” by the way, so you can’t blame the White Knight on us.)

I suggest using a miniature image of the cover as a replacement for the writer’s photograph. That places the emphasis where it belongs: on the book. I realize this deprives the writer of a chance to be mobbed at the airport by adoring fans who recognize them, but save that for your book signings where there’s security around.

In conclusion, I adjure you to keep one other point in mind. Back in the day when authors’ were paid by the word and novels were longer than 1,000 pages (just my style), you never saw Melville or Dostoyevsky or Joseph Conrad’s photograph on the back cover. They did pretty well without them. Of course, not necessarily while they were alive, but immortality has its appeal, doesn’t it?

And besides, that old standby, “Say cheese” when the photographer wants you to smile? It brings to mind that smelly stuff you wouldn’t be caught dead eating outside of a Very Expensive Restaurant, or the chunk of sharp cheddar growing mold in a compartment in the refrigerator door.

 

   COUNTERPOINT

       By Betsy J. Bennett

“I don’t believe there is any counterpoint to this segment.”

How little you know me, if you think I’m going to let that stand. And of course, and this will come as a surprise (apparently), I do have a counterpoint to that.

Writers need their pictures on the back of the book. That’s right, correct verb: need. We are solitary creatures on the whole, who stay in our dark caves with our messy desks and our interrupting (and inspirational) cats and write. And when we write, we often have to forego other pleasures. “Come out to lunch with me!” good friends will offer. Or, I need  you to sit on the Board of this minor, yet important 301c organization which will take all your free time. Many, many times we have to say no. If we didn’t, we wouldn’t write, and by association, wouldn’t be writers. So a picture on the back of a book helps our good friends from forgetting what we look like.

I’m not saying writers don’t go out to lunch with friends, or that they shouldn’t sit on Boards (someone has to be the voice of reason on those things!) but frequently there will be a deadline or a character who (foolishly) just got in the car with the axe murder, or even, this is far more frequent, when the words are not flowing when we just need to stay home and pound our head against the keyboard until we figure out where the next scene is going.

What’s important to writers is our name on the cover. Probably more important than high sales or great reviews (maybe not significantly more important), is seeing our hard work pay off with our name. The photograph on the inside back cover or the back is the same thing. It gives us validation. All that hard work is paying off. Maybe total strangers in airports won’t recognize us, (we probably don’t want them to recognize us anyway), BUT, and this is important, we will recognize ourselves. I will recognize my former critique partners I haven’t seen in 20 years, notice how they’ve aged. I’ll recognize you. And, I’ll recognize myself.

As a writer I often said I know Morien (my favorite protagonist, and sadly from a series of novels that might never be published) far more than I know my husband. This is probably true, even though Morien obeys my wishes just about as often as my poor husband does. I have to spend time with Morien. If I didn’t, who would? So, maybe with my picture on the back of some other work of fiction my husband would say, “That’s my wife! See!” when pointing to my picture.

So smile, “say Cheese,” you’ve earned a picture on the back of your book.

And cheese by the way is not always smelly things rusticating in the refrigeration. Cheese is what gives so many incredible dishes their flavor. Dare I mention lasagna, pizza, lemon cheesecake? Don’t get me started, the list is probably endless.

I’m ready to pose for a back cover photograph at any time, until then, if you need me, I’ll be with Commander Morien.